Tuesday, March 2, 2010

So You've Had a Bad Day

It has been a while since I have been so mortified. Louisa tends to embarrass me on a daily basis with things, but this time it was taken to a new level. I can remember growing up and doing things in which my parents would tell me that I embarrassed them. I never really got it. I do now. Thanks to today. A friend of mine just last week on Facebook was writing about how her child embarrassed her, and I even thought to myself, I am just glad that I have a little bit of time before Louisa gets there. Wrong again. Sorry Kristen, but now I feel you pain.

I go to pick Louisa up from school today and while sitting in carpool line, here comes the director holding Louisa’s bag and stuff, but no Lou. This is odd, since they usually bring the kids out. Well, she came to my side of the car and said the few words that a parent never wants to hear coming from a teacher at school, “I think you need to know about Louisa’s behavior today.” My heart sank, I felt my ears turn red and I almost threw-up on myself. I got nervous and started to sweat and then my lip started to twitch. Apparently, a girl in her class had something that she wanted, and instead of waiting her turn, Louisa took things into her own hands and scratched the mess out of the girl’s face. My heart started to beat out of my chest and I felt the bile rising higher and higher. As I opened my mouth to ask a question, I saw that the teacher had more and I quickly put the car in drive before I passed out and ran over someone in carpool line. Louisa is a spit-fire at home, but usually MOST of the times is an angel when it comes to being under someone else’s watch. She does a much better job of listening to directions from other people other than me. Not today. Louisa had a “rowdy, just kind of ‘off” day at school.” She apparently argued with the teachers and at one point stood up on top of the table and when the teacher asked her to get down, here comes the bile again, she stuck her tongue out at the teacher. I am appalled. I am mortified. I am disappointed and I am speechless. I understand that she is 2 and the director was so great to let me know that she isn’t the only child, and this is so unlike her behavior, and it happens all the time with other kids, etc. But I wasn’t hearing anything at that point. I feel hurt. My feelings are honestly hurt. I really don’t have anything nice to even say to Louisa right now. We had our “talk” about waiting our turn, asking for a turn, NOT scratching people EVER, NOT sticking out our tongue, following the teacher’s rules and instructions, etc. But she just stared at me all glazed-eyed and looking past me. I get it, she is 2. You kinda cannot reason with her. But I am just mortified.

We start swimming lessons this afternoon and I am so much more nervous now than I was to begin with. What if she acts out again….these are new teachers, they don’t know that she usually listens well. Oh my goodness. I just feel sick. And I want to cry. If you are reading and have been here….I REALLY need some encouraging words here. I know that this probably wont be the last time this happens and I really should just understand that she is 2 and get over it all, but I just can’t. Maybe tomorrow, but not today.

Until next time...


Russ, Anna, Pepper and Vesper said...

oh nooooo Amy I am so sorry!!!!!!! I can only imagine how you must feel and you are right, what can you say to a 2 year old. Just keep remembering you stayed at home from work for a reason, to teach her and raise her to be a kind, loving, compassionate child that treats other as she would like to be treated. Now this doesn't happen overnight and 2 year olds are their own damn breed!!!!!! Keep yo head up girl, keep telling her how wonderful she is and praising her for her ladylike behavior. She had a bad day, poor thing. You are an awesome Mommy and Louisa is an awesome kid (even if she is a damn wild indian sometimes, that is what I call Pepper)!

Sarah Broadus said...

I promise it she is not the only one!

Madyson was 15 months old when she got mad at the teacher for taking her toy away to put her down for a nap. She bit the teacher then smacked the teacher. As she was sitting in the sad chair, she decided to take her shoes off and throw them at another child. That child got hurt. I had to leave a very important meeting to go and talk to the director. They wanted to make sure things were okay at home.

Aubrie on the other hand "defends" herself all the time. If she gets hit she socks them back. If she gets bit, that child will be eaten.

I work for the Church that runs our daycare, it is VERY embarrassing when I receive calls that we are coming home with multiple discipline reports!

We are all entitled to our "off days" just remind her this is her one!

Its okay! I promise!

kosekcasa said...

Oh Amy...I feel your pain! Hang in there! It's a phase and it will pass and you will survive and you are a great mother and Lou is a precious girl and it's ok to cry because I have, and I'm sure I will again (maybe later today). Who knows?

Kate was not following directions at gymnastics, this past summer. She was 2 1/2 and wanted to do her own thing, no two ways about it. She just would not listen! So, we started working for a movie. Before leaving for gym she would pick out a movie and put it next to the DVD player. I then took a portable sticker chart with me to gymnastics and everytime that Kate followed a direction the first time she heard it she got a sticker. The chart would also come with us to lunch afterwards and wherever else I had to go. If she earned 10 stickers (pick a number), then she got her movie (also I had a picture of the TV at the end of the sticker chart so she would know when the stickers reached the TV she got to watch her movie). The first several times using the chart...no movie! So we would come home, put the movie away and everyone would cry. But by the end of it, she wanted to use the chart everywhere we went. So we did, and Kate earned lots of movies. She would say, "Mom tell me a direction."

I may need to reinstate the chart...I feel we have regressed.

Carol said...

Oh girl! You are NOT the only one! I have had to pick Mikey up from daycare for biting the mess out of another kid- I mean he drew blood! He was kicked out a few days. Oh, then when he peed on the wall (in his defense- I really think that was an accident), but he was kicked out. He has said/done MUCH worse to the teachers too! Gee, my list could go on & on!!! Hang in there! She did what we all wish we could do some days.

Elizabeth said...

if it makes you feel any better:

A boy was chasing me around and around and around when I was about five or six so I turned around and punched him in the lip. It bled. That was the first time I'd ever done something like that...and the last, really.

I can't relate as a mom, but I'm sure I'll be there in 2 years. Esp with a little boy! ;)

Amanda Jones said...

Aw I'm so sorry you had a bad day but I think all two year olds have maniac days! Colby doesn't go to school yet, but I'm sure I will get a call or two when he does.

I posted a pic of Colby playing with Chandler Reese and Louisa in the kitchen.

Brandi Smith said...

I promise, promise, promise, every little one has his or her moment every now and then! BUT I will tell you this...the 2 year olds have NOTHING on the 3's. 3's are bad, bad, bad!!! LOL! I am so glad I am FINALLY overcoming 3's, but looking back at my child and everyone else's they all have one thing in common, they all act up or show out-just all in a different way. I used to think OMG my child will never act that way, until I had one of my own and he is probably twice as bad as any of the rest some days LOL! He can def put on a show and be ugly at times. Don't be discouraged!

Jennifer said...

Oh Amy the stories I could tell you Matt at two years old bit a girl on National TV!!!! feel better?????

Katie said...

oh no amy! jacob behaves himself at home, so when the teacher tells me "mama, he bit a child today. mama, jacob slapped so and so", i get so frustrated because he only acts that way at school! ALWAYS over toys. i can only assume he sees other kids do it at school so he thinks its okay. he threw his crocs at the director of the school at lunchtime the other day because she got on to him for standing on the table. (he is no longer aloud to wear his crocs to school). you are right, it is down right embarrassing but HOW do you explain that to a 2 year old?!? THIS is the hard part about parenting for me, how do i discipline my son for something he never does in my presence?? grrrhhhh

Ashley said...

this is honestly very refreshing! i am so sick and tired of everyone telling me how wonderful and perfect preschool is going for their child when i am having such a struggle with it. last time i tried to take bradley, the teacher drug him out kicking and screaming right in front of all the other moms in the carpool line. he proceeded to have a meltdown on the sidewalk while the teacher came up to my car with this confused look on her face and asked, "does he just go limp on you like this?" so humiliating. bradley skipped the terrible two's but he is totally making up for it at three. we are going through the same crap, for sure. he just feels so entitled, and that's why i put him in preschool. he needs to learn that the world doesn't revolve around him....i just hate that i have to be humiliated in the process.